Presence Over Words – The Legacy of our Tito Ninong Jojo​

As a child, I always find Tito intimidating. He always had that poker face on, sitting quietly at the side, observing everyone. 

I think one of the traits we both share is his reserved personality.

Eventually growing up with him, his presence was always evident. We might not have mingled often, but his steady presence felt like a pillar in the family—strong, unwavering, and reliable, much like a rock. He was never easily swayed by quarrels within the family. If an issue arose, his responses always leaned toward peace.

As I became an adult, my perspective on him changed. I began to understand that being an adult transforms you in ways you can’t anticipate. Scheduling time, for instance, has been a struggle for me. But looking at Tito, somehow, he always manages to make time—for every occasion in my life and our family’s lives. Through ups and downs, birthdays, holiday seasons, weddings, and even funerals, Tito was always there.

Maybe that’s why his death has taken such a toll on the family. It was so unexpected. We had grown so used to his presence that his absence left an empty space in our hearts. I think all of us can learn from Tito. I’m sure everyone he met has been touched by his presence in one way or another.

Despite his quiet and sometimes intimidating demeanor, just showing up and being there was his way of showing deep love and affection for the people who mattered to him. He may not have been loud or openly expressive, but he made a lasting impact—slow and steady, like his personality.

Just recently, I noticed Tito had become more affectionate—or maybe he had always been that way, and I just hadn’t realized it. Tito wasn’t the physical touch type. Among all of Lola’s children, he was the only one I hadn’t hugged, and he wasn’t someone I could talk to openly. But I didn’t mind because I’m like that too, as an introvert.

However, I can clearly remember a special moment on my last birthday. He greeted me with a kiss on the cheek and a happy birthday. It was so new to me—I remember it vividly because Tito wasn’t usually like that with me. Despite not being the affectionate type, he tried to be intentional. He even started initiating conversations. In fact, he had more chats with my husband than with me, and I truly appreciated that about him.

While scrolling through my wedding photos last week, I noticed how happy he looked. And yet, in my memory, his poker face stands out. Maybe it’s because he seldom smiled in person. But seeing those photos gave me peace, knowing he was happy for me and more importantly lived a full life.

Tito inspires me—to enjoy life, to travel, to make time for family occasions, and to continue pursuing my goals regardless of age. He was bold, unafraid to take risks, and his growth over the years was steady and consistent. Those small, intentional steps bore fruit.

I deeply admire Tito’s unconditional love for his wife and children and the way he creates an impact despite his difference in personality. Tito, I know you are with our Lord now. Please be our guardian angel and enjoy the fruits of your labor! Continue to guide us as a family, together with Jade and Lolo Nap.

Your presence was never unnoticed. You have left a mark in our hearts and engraved yourself in our memories forever.